Peter Pan Reboot

*WARNING: POSSIBLE UNPOPULAR OPINION. FEEL FREE TO SPECULATE OR SEND ME A BASKET OF COOKIES. *

Peter Pan. What I like to call the best thing that Disney has ever come up with. I have been waiting for a reboot in this amazing story for over 2.5 BILLION YEARS (maybe even longer). So of course when I hear about this new movie “Pan” I’m so absolutely excited that it looks like someone put two cans of Red Bull in my double shot espresso.

Of course based on my ecstatic description, anyone (even if they live in Antarctica) could tell that I’m counting down the days until the trailer release, then the movie. I was originally planning on standing in line, fully dressed like Wendy Darling for 72 hours just to see the movie. After all, Hugh Jackman and Amanda Seyfried always equals party (Two words. Les Mis).

Let me tell you how the world’s first tsunami of tears began. Little did I know Peter was going to be a child. Yes, I know he’s never supposed to grow up. But for all of the teenagers and adults who are into Disney (ESPECIALLY “Once Upon a Time”), I think I could speak for a majority of people when I say we were expecting A LITTLE bit of Wendy and Peter interaction. Maybe that’s just me (but it’s probably not).

Another thing contributing to the world hating me along with my love for Wendy and Peter is MARY DARLING SEEMS TO BE PETER’S MOTHER IN THIS MOVIE. Maybe I’m just incredibly uneducated in the world of Disney or something but last time I checked, Mary is the mother of Wendy, John, and Michael. NOT PETER. The last thing I want is for my ship to sink because of INCEST. (This is the point at which you should laugh for me out of pity because 1. I’m typing with rage and 2. I made a “ship” pun and I’m only 4 paragraphs in.)

Here are selling points to this movie because I’m choosing to be “glass half full” type of  person (just ignore the messy rant above you while I say this). This movie was made by the same geniuses who made Harry Potter (maybe the dementor that sucked my soul out after watching this trailer could make a guest appearance!!!). Another thing, the cast lineup is as majestic as the mermaid Cara Delevingne is playing.

Let me be clear when I say, I’m hoping that all of these things are a big old lie and this prequel movie to “Hook” is MANY years before prepubescent Peter turns into a Peter that we can ship with Wendy (assuming she isn’t his SISTER). If someone would like to prove me wrong in my assumptions, than please comment, because this mental breakdown is as wild as a hippogriff.

By the way, I’m contemplating on writing a post on my excitement for (A) Suicide Squad or (B) X-Men Apocalypse. I might just do both, but not in the same post of course. Marvel and DC are located in separate parts of my heart, along with my obsession with coffee cups and Pepe memes.